


Saying Sorry Won’t Stop The Pain

by Lillian_nator



Series: Wholesome Week [3]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Gen, Idk Dream Regrets what he did., Wholesome Week (Video Blogging RPF), friends - Freeform, wholesome week
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-28
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:49:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26133742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lillian_nator/pseuds/Lillian_nator
Summary: Dream suddenly, and deeply regrets what he has done.What - what has he done?... He is a monster.Day 3 Of Wholesome Week !
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Clay | Dream & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream & Wilbur Soot, Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit
Series: Wholesome Week [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1896955
Comments: 57
Kudos: 851





	Saying Sorry Won’t Stop The Pain

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mellifluouswoole](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mellifluouswoole/gifts).



> Hope you enjoy!! This is set in the same universe as "Boys Will Be Boys" and "Visions of Blood and Tears" I suggest that you read "Boys Will Be Boys" first but you don't have to. 
> 
> Anyways, Have Fun! I hope this makes you sad, because I get sad thinking about it. I'm done with fluff man. Angst time now. 
> 
> Btw, You're just gonna have to deal with the fact that I am a day behind in Wholesome Week and I probably won't catch up lol.

_One_

Dream stepped forward, eyes on the ground, his bow pointed towards his feet. 

Did he really have to do this? He cracks - these are - these were his friends, did he really want to hurt them? Did he really want to - 

_Two_

He stepped forward yet again, eyes drifting to SapNap and George. They looked cautious. They looked scared and unsure - and 

Did he really want to do this? 

_Three_

His feet moved on their own. Eyes darting all around him - he couldn’t see Wilbur, he needed to see Tubbo, he needed to see the faces of those he was hurting, he needed -

Was he going to shoot the boy who he had taken under his wing oh so long ago? Was he - 

_Four_

He took a gigantic step forward. Anything to give Tommy the upperhand. 

He had to be sure of himself, he had to be confident, he had to be - 

_Five_

He couldn’t kill the boy, no - no

What kind of monster would do that? Tommy was still one of Dreams closest friends - was he? - he was one of Dreams friends - he was, he was - 

_Six_

He had to win. 

L’Manberg did this to themselves - he had to win. He had to. 

Tommy did this to himself - Dream had to win. These were Tommy’s terms - he had to, he had to - 

_Seven_

He stumbled forward. 

What kind of monster was he? 

He destroyed two kids’ houses. He fought against his friends who wanted peace. He took away everything. He made his own friends fight against one another - who was he?

 _Eight_

His head looked back. 

Wilbur. Wilbur. It - it was Wilbur’s fault. He put Tommy and Tubbo in this war. Wilbur started the revolution. Wilbur rioted. Wilbur - this was Wilbur’s fault. 

_Nine_

Who was Dream to blame this on himself - who was he to take responsibility - who was he ? 

He was an adult. 

He should’ve ended this - 

_Ten_

He didn’t move - he fumbled with his bow - 

He turned around. 

Don’t kill him - don’t kill him - just hurt him 

Don’t. Kill. Him. 

_Fire_

Dream aimed for his stomach, for his ribs, for his side. Anything that could’ve been fixed with a few healing potions and some rest. Anything that wouldn’t have been fatal. 

His arrow moved. 

He stabbed Tommy in the heart. He killed him. 

No - NO 

No no no no no no no 

No - he didn’t - he couldn’t 

Did he - he - he

“I - I - I - I’m so sorry.” Dream barely stumbled out. 

“How could you!” Wilbur screamed, pulling Tubbo away from the blonde teen. “You just killed a kid! How - How could you!” 

Dream looked at his hands shaking, “I never meant to - I - I never- I’m so sorry Wil”. 

The tears were streaming down the older man’s face, he clutched onto the still living teen. Tubbo sobbed into Wilbur’s chest, clutching onto his jacket roughly. 

Dream didn’t mean for this to happen - 

“You don’t get to call me that. You don’t get to act like we are friends. You Monster. You just KILLED Tommy. You just - “ Wilbur sobbed. “You took away my little brother - you, you” 

“You Killed My best Friend!” Tubbo screamed at Dream from his spot in Wilbur’s chest. Tears running down his face at a rapid rate. 

Dream stepped away, he couldn’t face the two - he just killed Tommy - he just 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**He woke up.**

Dream jumped out of the twisted covers of his bed in a cold sweat. 

Luckily, on that day, a week ago to the night, he aimed correctly. Hitting the side of one of Tommy’s ribs. He didn’t hit him in the heart. 

But he still hit him. 

Tommy used to look up to Dream, Tubbo used to smile when he saw Dream, they used to greet him, and tell the elder about their adventures of the day. Tommy and Tubbo used to trust Dream. Dream used to keep them safe. 

They were no longer safe. Because of Dream. 

Dream _Was_ A Monster. 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He had to make things right - he had to - 

He had to apologize. 

Dream quickly rushed out of bed, tripping over the clothes strewn across the floor. He put on the first sweatshirt he could find, and rushidly threw on his hiking boots. 

He had to apologize. 

Stumbling outdoors, he thought of all of the times he used to walk through the night to find the two younger boys. 

Before the war, before Dream took the disks, before everything, Dream used to consider Tommy and Tubbo his little brothers. 

Back then, everything was fun. The server was peaceful. 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

While he was walking, he remembered the nights he would spend with all of his friends. 

Ponk, Callahan, Purpled, SapNap, Punz, George, Tubbo, Tommy, and himself would all spend the day together. They would explore the nether, and build houses, and climb mountains. It was great. 

Tommy, Tubbo, and Purpled were friends back then, before the SMP was split into two. 

The three teens would often be seen together, although Tommy and Tubbo were always closest, Purpled was the unofficial third wheel. They would have lunch at Dreams house. Back when Dream used to keep them safe from the monsters. 

Dream doesn’t like to think about those days too much. The days he would spend training the trio. He taught them how to find food and shelter, what villagers to trade with, what each monster did, how to defend themselves from each monster, and overall how to survive. 

One of his favorite memories was when Dream and SapNap took Tommy and Tubbo to the diving pole and taught them how to MLG water. Tommy had picked it up so quickly. It was easily one of the blondes best skills, he could jump off of anything and be fine. He reminisced about how the young boy’s eyes lit up to match the sun. His blue eyes looked similar to the beautiful cloudless sky above them. 

It was one of the last things that Dream had taught them, it was one of his last happy memories before the disc war. It was one of his last memories of the boys being happy. 

Sundays were always a great day, not even just now, not even because of their ‘no war declaration on Sundays’ rule. 

Everyone used to spend Sundays together. 

Even when Wilbur, and Eret, and Fundy joined, they all spent Sundays together. 

The tradition started when the boys were just 13, most of the now adults were pretty much children as well, Dream remembers those early days, he was only 18 himself. SapNap, his right hand man, was Tommy’s age at the time, it seemed so long ago. Those days were filled with boyish laughter and petty schoolyard games. Back when they were all just kids - 

Well he guesses some of them still are. 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

While he was walking, he remembered when Purpled grew apart from the boys because of his neutrality. 

Because he refused to choose a side in the wars. 

He wouldn’t choose Dream, which meant they couldn’t hate him, but he wouldn’t choose Tommy and Tubbo, which meant they couldn’t like them either. 

Dream blames himself for that as well. Breaking up a friendship. 

Purpled hasn’t been the same since the friendship broke off, he hadn’t smiled as bright. And, to be honest, there was a sparkle in Tubbo and Tommy’s eyes that disappeared when they lost their other friend. 

He saw the looks that the duo gave the other blonde teen, and he wished that he didn’t. 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

While he was jogging atop the grass floor, he remembered when Wilbur first joined the server. Dream had told Wil about the little family he had built. Wilbur had responded by saying he knew Tommy from another SMP, that Tommy, this guy named Phil, and another named Techno had once been extremely close. 

At the time, Dream felt a pang of jealousy in his chest. That someone else had built a small family with his little brother. And as he thinks back now, he tore his own family apart. 

It was his fault. 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He still stumbled through the thick forest, he still remembered after the first war, when the SMP had started to split into two, when he saw the boys and Wilbur for the first time. 

When he saw the boys with their new family. 

When he knew that he messed up. 

It had been a week or so after the disk war. Tommy had still not talked to him, or SapNap. He talked once to George. It was to tell the older brunette to leave him alone. 

It hurt. 

Tubbo had talked to Dream once, to tell him that Tubbo couldn’t forgive Dream, that Tubbo needed a while to think. 

That had been the worst confrontation of his life. 

If he wasn’t busy denying it, he would’ve thought about the time he cried after that certain confrontation with Tubbo. About how he hid from SapNap and George, while he cried himself to sleep. 

Furthermore, later that week, when he saw Eret, Fundy, Wilbur, and the two boys gathered around the dirt shack that Tommy called his home, Dream’s heart shattered. Wilbur was carrying Tommy on his shoulders, and Eret was doing the same to Tubbo, the two boys held swords, and the five of them were cackling in hysterics. Fundy was in the background, it looked like he was keeping some sort of score, they all had bright smiles on their faces. 

The game of jousting did not hurt Dream, it was the fact that his family had broken into two, that his brothers were continuing without him. 

That night Dream watched the 5 boys silently in the Trees wishing that he could be with them, that he didn’t have to be alone. 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dream stumbled, and tripped, and fell, and ran forward. 

He had to make things right. 

He had a blinding headache paired with extreme pain deep in his chest. He knew what it was, guilt, but he did not want to acknowledge it. He wanted to make everything better, he wanted to make the pain go away. 

He put a hand to his head as he stumbled over a few forest rocks. He had to fix everything, he had to get his little brothers back, he had to make amends, he had to - 

He saw two familiar figures atop the Caravan waiting for the sun to rise. 

Perfect. No Wilbur. Just Dream, Tubbo, and Tommy. 

The way things used to be. 

He ran forward with much more momentum, and jumped over the branches in front of him. The twigs crunched as he made his way to the van, he didn’t think twice about it. 

But, the twigs snapping made enough noise to notify the boys of Dream’s arrival. 

They turned around terrified. Tubbo had to put his arm around the others back to keep him steady. Dream couldn’t see it in the dark, but Tommy was still worse for wear. He had bruises lining his sides, scars lining his arms and legs, and his torso was still bloody, stitches still new, from when Dream shot him with an arrow. His ribs still haven’t fully healed on his right side, the broken ones turned cracked, and the cracked turned bruised, but they still hurt like a bitch. He still couldn’t fully walk. Tubbo also was still healing, unfortunately the two teens were hurt the most during the war, they guess it was fortunate as well, since teens heal quicker, but still, it hurt everyone involved to see the teens in so much pain. 

The two boys were terrified. Fear crossed over their faces, pain in their eyes, flashbacks were playing deep in their brain. 

Dream continued his venture forward until an arm pushed him back stopping him a foot or two away from the caravan. 

“Don’t you dare get any closer.” A fierce and protective voice stopped Dream in his tracks. Wilbur.

“I - I - I was just going to” Dream stumbled out, words tripping over one another. 

“You are going to do nothing. You have caused enough pain. If you take one more step forward, I will kill you right here, right now. You. Have. No. Right. To. Be. Here.” Wilbur puts his hand on Dream’s chest, stepping in front of the two boys so that Dream couldn’t see them. 

Dream could hear the silent sobs racking the boy's chest - did he do that? 

They are crying because of him? What has he done - 

“I - I just wanted to -” He stuttered yet again. 

“Leave.” Wilbur stated aloud, but he silently whispered to Dream looking into his eyes, “You are scaring them. Please.” 

Dream felt the arrow to his heart this time, as he slowly stepped away. 

He did this - he is the reason his family is torn apart - 

He did this. 

He did this. 

He felt the pain flare up in his chest again. The guilt consumed him, as he ran to Dream SMP. 

He took one last look at the three boys behind him, he noticed the pain that flashed through Tubbo and Tommy’s eyes. The way that Wilbur had to help them sit down, how Tommy would not let go of his right side, the way the two teens cling onto one another. He didn’t miss the protective hold that Wilbur pulled them both into while they watched the Sunset. 

He felt the pain once again - that used to be him, that used to be - 

**Saying Sorry Won’t Stop The Pain.**

**Author's Note:**

> I really, super hope you enjoy. 
> 
> You should go check out dande_lione , they made this whole week possible! And I just wanted to thank them because I think a lot of us needed this right now. 
> 
> Tell me what you think down below, uh - catch you later!
> 
> Thanks!
> 
> ALSO YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, WHOLESOME WEEK (Video Blogging RPF) HAS ITS OWN LIKE CURATED TAG NOW THATS SICK


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